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addiction

Sound of Metal – A Place of the Kingdom?

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Is healing a return to what came before, or is it finding life anew? In Darius Marder’s Sound of Metal, a man has to decide what he will accept in his life that has been turned upside down. He discovers that what he thinks will make him whole may not be as good as he hopes, but he also discovers that there are gifts that he can tap into that will bring him peace and joy.

Ruben (Riz Ahmed) and Lou (Olivia Cooke) travel the country as the band Blackgammon, a punk metal band. Ruben plays the drums. Their trademark is that they are LOUD. Yet, when in private, they listen to much softer music. One day Ruben suddenly loses his hearing. When he goes to a doctor, the news is not good. It will not be coming back.

When Lou sees that he is beginning to return to an addict’s behavior pattern, she takes him to a farm where there is a community of deaf addicts in recovery. The community is led by Joe (Paul Raci), an alcoholic who lost his hearing in Vietnam.  It is a hard transition for Ruben. When he comes into the community, he is hyper-isolated. He can’t understand them when they sign. They can’t understand him when he speaks. He is more interested in getting his hearing back (through very expensive cochlear implants) than adapting to the world as a deaf person. His goals are different than those around him.

Riz Ahmed as Ruben in SOUND OF METAL Courtesy of Amazon Studios

In time, Ruben begins to learn to sign. He also begins teaching deaf children to play drums. But all the while, he wants more. He is always busy. He fixes things around the farm. But all of that is a way to avoid his feelings. Joe notes that his refusal to accept his situation is very much the behavior of an addict. Joe gives him an assignment: to go into a room with just a pencil and paper and write. He can write anything. It doesn’t have to be a story or even sentences. Just write and write and write.

The addictive behavior that Joe notes is interesting. It is not only the danger of drugs that Ruben must deal with, but the hearing life that he is trying to hold on to. It is hard to move forward when tied to the past. His desire to hear again—at any cost—is a barrier to finding something new.

I need to admit that when I first read the synopsis of the film as I prepared for AFI Fest, it wasn’t high on my list. But when I heard others who had seen it earlier rave about it, I made sure in include it in my schedule. It turned out to be one of my favorites of the festival. It is extremely engaging on an emotional level. Ruben struggles throughout the film, not just with his hearing loss and his addictions, but against a future he cannot see. Even as he begins to have some growth, he continues to be deeply troubled.

We also learn that this is in reality a spiritual struggle. That epiphany comes when Joe tells Ruben that he too needs to spend time writing and writing. When he can write no more, and there are moments of stillness, “that place is the Kingdom of God”.

That idea reminded me of the story of Elijah in 1 Kings 19. When the prophet felt overwhelmed by his struggle with King Ahab, he went to the wilderness to find God. He wanted to whine a bit. As he waited for God a mighty wind that could break rocks came, but God wasn’t in the wind. Neither was God in the great earthquake or the fire that followed. But then there was “a sound of sheer silence. There the voice of God spoke to him.

We often overlook the spiritual aspects of the struggles we have—whether it is addiction, illness, or the emotional struggle of the COVID pandemic. We want things to be “normal”. We want our pain to end. We think if we do something, or try harder, things will get better. But sometimes, what is really needed is to stop and wait for the voice of God that comes in the stillness.

Sound of Metal is available on Amazon Prime Video beginning December 4th, 2020

Hillbilly Elegy – Family Turmoil

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“Where we come from is who we are, but we choose every day who we become.”

J. D. Vance’s bestselling memoir Hillbilly Elegy has been brought to the screen by Ron Howard. The memoir recounted Vance’s childhood in the Ohio Rust Belt, where he was raised by a mother struggling with addiction and his grandparents who came from rural Appalachia. After spending time in the Marines, Vance went on to college, then Yale Law School. The film carries the story arc, but comes up short on the kind of insight that Vance brought to the book.

HILLBILLY ELEGY: (L to R) Haley Bennett (“Lindsay”), Gabriel Basso (J.D. Vance), Amy Adams (“Bev”). Photo Cr. Lacey Terrell/NETFLIX © 2020

The film focuses on the troubled family relationship. As Vance (played as adult by Gabriel Basso and as a youth by Owen Asztolos) is preparing for interviews for a summer internship at a prestigious law firm (a job he needs to be able to continue law school), he gets a call from his sister that their mother Bev (Amy Adams) is hospitalized because of a heroin overdose. He has to make a long drive from New Haven to Ohio, deal with trying to get his mother in to rehab, then drive back in hopes of making an important meeting.

As the trip plays out, we see flashbacks to his youth. His mother, while loving, constantly battled substance abuse. The more nurturing relationship in his life was his grandmother, Memaw (Glenn Close). Memaw was a no-nonsense woman who embodies the values of hard work and honesty that Vance, in his memoir, associates with the rural Appalachian community. After one of Bev’s breakdowns, J.D. moves in with Memaw, who pushes him to excel in school.

HILLBILLY ELEGY: (L to R) Haley Bennett (“Lindsay”), Glenn Close (“Mamaw”),Owen Asztalos (“Young J.D. Vance”). Photo Cr. Lacey Terrell/NETFLIX © 2020

The film becomes not so much a story of those values as a story about a family struggling with addiction. It becomes about J.D.’s mixed feelings about his love for his family and the struggle to succeed in another world. That was all a part of the book, but the book became such a success because it offered much more.

Films by their nature have a great deal of voyeurism. We are watching other people’s lives from a distance. The same is true of memoirs and novels. In his memoir, Vance took us into the white working-class culture that he grew up in. He does not look down at it. He values it. He shows us the trials, frustrations, and the values that have led to alienation. The voyeurism of the memoir seemed to lessen the distance the reader might have felt in thinking about Appalachia and the working-class. The film boils down to a less helpful voyeurism. We watch a family in its pain, but we are always a bit removed.

HILLBILLY ELEGY: (L to R) Glenn Close (“Mamaw”), Amy Adams (“Bev”). Photo Cr. Lacey Terrell/NETFLIX © 2020

When the book came out in 2016 (a few months before the election of President Trump), it served as a kind of bridge between two segments of our society. Vance has a foot in both worlds. He knows just how easy it is to settle into despair. But he also exemplifies the ability to advance through a strong work ethic. Early in the film we see J.D. panicking at a formal dinner over all the silverware. But we can tell that this is a world that he is growing into. That social and political insight were the strength of the memoir, but is missing from the film.

Hillbilly Elegy is playing in select theaters (where open). It will be available on Netflix on November 24.

For audio of our conversation with Ron Howard, click here.

Photos courtesy of Netflix.

Tuesday at AFIFest 2020

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AFIFest 2020 Presented by Audi has teamed up with NBC News to present the Meet the Press Film Festival, programs of short documentaries about issues facing the world. Today I took in the program entitled “Justice for All” which included three shorts.

My Brother’s Keeper (22 minutes), directed by Laurence Topham, is the story of Mohamedou Slahi, a Guantanamo detainee for 14 years, and Steve Wood, who as a Marine was assigned to guard him. In their time together, they developed a friendship. After Slahi was released (he was never charged with a crime), he went home to Mauritania. In this film Wood makes the trip to visit his friend.

Laurence Ralph uses animation in The Torture Letters (13 minutes). The film is a series of open letters to various victims of police violence in Chicago. That violence ranges from intimidation and harassment to violence that can lead to death. The use of animation makes it possible for us to better understand that such abusive behaviors by police are indeed torture. An interesting connection to My Brother’s Keeper: In the Q&A after the films, Ralph noted that one of the people who tortured Slahi was a Chicago police officer.

Can fight solve problems? In Lions in the Corner (9 minutes) Paul Hairston introduces us to Chris Wilmore (known to most as Scarface), a past felon with a very difficult childhood who runs Street Beefs, a backyard fight club in which people with issues come and fight it out rather than solving problems with guns of knives. In the process he has created a community of people who have found a place where they can find respect. Often the battles in the ring serve to vent the anger, but also create a bond between former enemies.

Twin brothers Arie and Chuko Esiri bring us Eyimofe (English title: This is My Desire), the stories of two people seeking a better life away from Nigeria. Set in a Lagos slum, the stories of Mofe and Rosa are told sequentially (although their paths cross at a few points). Both are trying to gather the necessary paperwork (all of which requires money) to emigrate to Europe. But events do not work well for them. Mofe loses his family and then his job. Rosa, who is seeking to take her younger sister Grace with her, struggles to fend off the advances of her landlord, while navigating an unscrupulous woman who will pay for their trip (but at a great price). The film shows us the struggle, the hope, and the desperation of those in or near poverty. The colors and customs we observe provide a sense of ethnography set within the narrative.

Jacinta and Rosemary at Maine Correctional Center, 2016. Photo © Jessica Earnshaw.

Jacinta is a heartbreaking documentary from Jessica Earnshaw. We first meet the young woman named Jacinta as she has a month left on a nine month sentence in the Maine Correctional Center, where her mother Rosemary is also incarcerated. It follows her after he release through times of hopefulness and despair. Jacinta is an addict who isn’t able to fight her addiction very long. The first trigger is when she reconnects with her daughter Caylynne. The emotions are too much for her so she retreats into getting high. The spiral continues. But all this is tied together by mother/daughter relationships—Rosemary and Jacinta, and Jacinta and Caylynne.

Earnshaw has incredible access both inside the prison and in the personal lives of Jacinta and her family. It creates a very honest film about addiction and its consequences. That can be heartbreaking in itself, but it is even more so as we learn about Jacinta’s youth and her relationship with her mother (whom she still loves and idolizes) and also see the bond that Jacinta has with Caylynne and how Caylynne deals with all the things in her mother’s life. A very moving and powerful film.

Heidi Ewing is better known for documentary filmmaking (Jesus Camp, The Boys of Baraka, and Detropia), but brings her first narrative feature, I Carry You with Me, to the festival. It is based on the story of Iván and Gerardo, to young men who fall in love in Mexico. Iván has a son, but when it is discovered that he is with another man, he is forbidden to see his son. Iván works in a restaurant and is trained as a chef, but cannot get past dishwashing. He decides to “cross over” to the US. He expects to find good work, but only can get the most menial of jobs.

Eventually Gerardo joins him and they struggle together until luck gives Iván a shot at his dream. Through the years Iván and Gerardo eventually find a good life in New York City. They are even able to be openly gay and share in Gay Pride events. But they are cut off from their families. They can never go back, or they may not be able to return. This is at once a decades-long love story and a commentary on the lives that many people are living in our midst.

Jarrid Wilson & Hope in the Face of Suicide

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Jarrid Wilson

Aren’t Christians supposed to have it “all figured out?” Does the gospel really work? Can people change? Is victory over our struggles possible? How?

In this episode of the Your Sunday Drive podcast, we talk about Jarrid Wilson, a pastor and mental health advocate who recently committed suicide, and some related questions for Christians and non-Christians alike.

If you need help, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK. 

Come along for Your Sunday Drive – quick conversation about current events, politics, pop culture and more, from the perspective of a couple of guys trying to follow Jesus.

Hosts: Matt Hill and Nate Polzin. Presented by the Church in Drive of Saginaw, MI, as often as possible. Please visit churchindrive.com and facebook.com/thechurchindrive



Ben Is Back: Broken Honesty on a Bruised Holiday

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Ben is Back tells the story of Ben Burns (Lucas Hedges), a nineteen-year-old drug addict who unexpectedly returns to his family’s suburban home on Christmas Eve. From the moment she first sees him, Ben’s mom, Holly (Julia Roberts), welcomes him openly yet remains cautious of her son’s drug addiction. Over a turbulent twenty-four hours, new truths are revealed, and a mother’s unconditional love is put to the test as Holly fights ceaselessly to keep her son sober.

Written and directed by Peter Hedges (About a Boy, Dan in Real Life), Ben is Back is a gritty family drama that proves both compelling and authentic. Although the set-up of the film seems relatively straightforward, the script continues to surprise with its willingness to stare down the inner darkness of its characters. This level of nuance provides the cast with an opportunity to showcase their talent, especially Roberts and Hedges. Without question, this is Roberts’ best role in years and, arguably, one of the best performances of her career. Young Hedges’ portrayal of the damaged and conflicted Ben also holds his own up against Roberts’ powerhouse performance, proving that he continues to grow into his talent.

Throughout the film, Ben constantly reminds his mother that truth is a luxury. While he repeatedly quotes his sponsor’s call for brutal honesty, he also reminds his mother that he cannot be trusted. Committed to delving into his history with unflinching honesty about what he has done and with whom, Ben becomes a walking testament to the belief that we ‘reap what we sow’. Recounting every face, every moment, and every action of his journey, he [now] recognizes that there have been consequences to his actions in ways he could have never considered, whether it be to others or his own soul. (In addition, by setting the film through Christmas Day, the film also adds another layer of complexity by juxtaposing Ben’s battle with addiction with a time of year often seen as celebrating new beginnings.)

On the other hand, Holly’s views her son through the eyes of love and, as a result, has difficulty accepting that he is as ‘bad’ as he believes. While this type of behavior is typical for a parent in this situation—who wouldn’t want to believe the best in their child?—things become more complicated as Holly begins to blur the lines of truth and lies in order to convince herself that things are better than they are. (In fact, at one point, Holly even begins to reframe history by trying to persuade Ben that his behavior really wasn’t all that bad.) There’s a complexity to Roberts’ role as she blends her performance as Holly with both unconditional grace and blurred truth. Her love for Ben pursues him relentlessly as her ‘lost sheep’. However, at the same time, her belief in Ben also borders on manic through her unwillingness to accept the truth about his life. Are there boundaries between love and grace? Ben is Back reveals the complexities of unconditional love and commitment to one’s child, especially when addictions and mental health come into play.

Anchored by remarkable performances by its leads and a solid script, Ben is Back creates a world where one’s hidden darkness must be faced in order to step out on the other side. In doing so, it also manages to successfully subvert the ‘family drama’ by demonstrating the complexities of a parent’s love for a broken child.

Ben is Back is in theatres now.

Beautiful Boy: Everything

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Image result for beautiful boy movie poster

David Sheff (Steve Carell) dabbled in his share of drugs as a youth but seemingly grew out of that phase and developed into a responsible adult. On the other hand, his son, Nic (Timothee Chalamet), didn’t have the same luck in his experimental drug phase. Although experimenting with numerous drugs, Nic specifically became addicted to crystal meth, a highly addictive and dangerous drug that is nearly impossible to quit.

Directed by Felix Van Groeningen, Beautiful Boy is based on the true story of Nic Sheff’s addiction, David’s heart-wrenching struggle to save his son, and the family dynamic surrounding this difficult situation.

Image result for beautiful boy movie

When Nic wasn’t home, David seemed to live a picture perfect life with his newer family; his second wife, Karen (Maura Tierney), and their two children. They seemed happy and lived in a generous and well-kept home. David cooked and Karen made art. But when Nic was around, everything seemed heavy. David began to devote his life to helping his son, not only by being there for him and taking him to rehab, but by researching the drug and what was actually going on inside of Nic’s body. This was clearly a large time commitment and was very emotionally draining, not only on David but on his family as well.

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Throughout the film, we see numerous flashbacks to when Nic was a young boy. Not only does this highlight the special relationship between Nic and David, but it humanizes him as an addict. All too often, I think that addicts are portrayed as less than others or looked down upon. Some people have no pity for them because they “did this to themselves” and have to live with the consequences. Sometimes people may see them as pathetic. Perhaps some people wonder what drove them to drugs in the first place. Do they have an undesirable home life? Were they abused? That may be the case for some, but not all. Everyone that has an addiction came from somewhere. They have parents. They were an adorable baby and a cute kid. They had (and still do have) potential. A lot of them just took a wrong turn somewhere. I appreciate that this film humanizes the addict because it arms us with more sympathy to help as opposed to scoffing and ignoring the problem.

I felt as though lighting played an important role in this film. When Nic was with David, particularly at home (but also in diner scenes) everything seemed quite dark. Despite their home being larger than average, there also seemed to be more claustrophobic spaces when Nic and David were together. I found this surprising given that their father/son relationship initially seemed strong, and it didn’t feel as though David was any sort of trigger for Nic when it came to his addiction. Outside of the home, we are met with stunning, bright, and vast landscapes with the rolling green hills, as well as the ocean. When Nic is in LA with his mother, Vicki (Amy Ryan) on the other hand, everything seems much lighter and airy. Also surprising given the relationship between Nic and Vicki was much less strong.

I was also impressed by the sound mixing and score which did a great job at conveying the emotion and tone of any given scene.

In the end, Beautiful Boy felt somewhat flat in terms of story arc – there was no specific climax or rise and fall. However, because it is based on a true story, I can understand why it came across that way. A lot of the scenes felt like an extended montage of the family dancing through this battle.

Image result for beautiful boy movie

This film left me with the question of ‘how much can we really help?’ How can we help our family or friends with addiction without being overbearing, accusatory and perhaps driving them right back to their vice? There is a scene in this film where David and Karen attend a family support group. On the wall, there is a sign referring to the ‘3 C’s’. I didn’t Cause it, I can’t Cure it, and I can’t Control it. Addiction is scientifically proven to be a chronic disease. It is beyond you and beyond the addict. When you grasp that, I feel as though it becomes just a bit easier to understand their struggle and how placing blame or trying force a change often has adverse effects.

If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, here are some references that may be of assistance:

Canada: http://www.ccdus.ca/Eng/Pages/Addictions-Treatment-Helplines-Canada.aspx

USA: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/addictions

Beautiful Boy – Love in the Time of Addiction

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Addiction can tear apart families and ruin lives. Often the bonds of love lead people to try to help in whatever way they can. But those bonds can be fragile. Beautiful Boy is the story of a family that had to deal over a period of years with an addict who just couldn’t seem to be able to break away from his dependency. The film is based on two memoirs by father and son: Beautiful Boy by journalist David Sheff and Tweak by Nic Sheff.

Oakley Bull as Daisy Sheff, Maura Tierney as Karen Babour, Timothée Chalamet as Nic Sheff, Christian Convery as Jasper Sheff, and Steve Carell as David Scheff star in BEAUTIFUL BOY

David (Steve Carell) and Nic (Timothée Chalamet) are a happy and loving father and son. Nic is about to leave for college, but decides to take some time off first. The family is well off and there are firm bonds with Nic’s stepmother Karen (Maura Tierney) and young siblings. Soon, it is discovered that Nic is addicted to crystal meth. The rest of the film chronicles Nic’s and the family’s struggle with that addiction. It takes place over a period of years and many rehabs, relapses, promises, and deceptions. At times Nic is close to death, but that fact in itself is not enough for him to overcome his addiction.

Because the film is based on the two memoirs, it becomes essentially a father and son movie. Although there is also a good deal of interaction involving Nic’s siblings, stepmother, and birthmother (Amy Ryan). The relationship between David and Nic is the driving force of the story. David would do anything to help Nic. But as the story progresses he learns that there is really nothing that he can do to help Nic conquer this demon—except to love him. That is not said lightly or as saccharine. To love Nic in the midst of his addiction is a challenge. How does one continue to love someone who lies to you, steals from you, and deceives you year after year? Even when David turns down Nic’s pleas for “help”, we can see it is evidence of David’s real love for Nic.

Maura Tierney as Karen Barbour and Steve Carell as David Scheff star in BEAUTIFUL BOY

Screenwriters Luke Davies and Felix von Groeningen (who also directs) have made a seamless story of the two perspectives. It never seems like just David’s story or just Nic’s story. The two stories are not just different viewpoints, but a whole that reflects the bond between father and son—a love that runs so deep that even when it seems it must be beyond salvaging, it continues to hold them together in some way.

Timothée Chalamet as Nic Sheff and Steve Carell as David Scheff star in BEAUTIFUL BOY

It must be said that this is a painful movie to watch. There is a raw emotional honesty to all the relationships in the film. Emotion is a key element of the story. At one point David is doing everything he can to intellectually understand addiction. But Nic’s addiction has a very emotional center to it. It is only by entering into the emotions within the relationship that we understand just how painful this is for all involved.

Photos courtesy of Amazon Studios.

Breakthrough S2: Ep 1 and 2 – Protect Thyself

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Eighteen months ago, Brian Grazer and Ron Howard decided to spearhead a series on National Geographic Channel involving advances in scientific technology.  Entitled Breakthrough, each episode was created by a specific director and tackled a unique aspect of how science could help society in general. The series was recently renewed for a second season (10PM/9 CT on Tuesdays), providing the viewing audience six more glimpses into a world where science meets life head-on.

The first episode aired last week and centered around an issue many people deal with on a daily basis: addiction.  This doesn’t necessarily refer to drugs or tobacco, but can also refer to cell phone usage, selfies, or other items/hobbies that become “something more” to a person.  There are numerous ways addictions can be dealt with, but the episode focused on an experimental technique—psychedelic drugs such as LSD, Ibogaine, or Psilocybin (magic mushrooms).  The treatment is not for all, that’s for sure—but in the three cases shown, director David Lowery (Pete’s Dragon) made the treatment process look absolutely spellbinding.  The episode was definitely not what I expected, but was intriguing nevertheless.

Cyber terror was the subject of the second episode—an issue many of us summarily dismiss as something that can’t happen to us.  Target doesn’t think so after seeing their online system compromised a number of years ago with millions of credit card numbers exposed for the world to use.  It doesn’t take a lot to break into a computer – a simple USB drive can wreak all sorts of havoc.  However, there are white hat hackers who legally help companies secure their networks by attempting to break into them.  They have lots of work to do—major companies’ detection rate of cyberattacks is only 6%, and when they do find something, it takes seven months to find it.   In fact, by 2019, cyberattacks will cost the global economy $2 trillion dollars. It needs to be fixed now.

To make things worse, director Steven Hoggard (Inside the Green Berets) reveals that cybercriminals (black hat hackers) are using encryption-based devices to recruit people into terrorist groups such as ISIS. Some have even been able to hack into US Central Command!  Some journalists in the UK havegone undercover to help stop this from occurring, using a similar technique to how criminals were caught on the show To Catch a Predator.  Do they always succeed?  Not quite. But stopping one attack is better than none.  That’s why it’s always important to protect oneself from the attacks of enemies who cannot be seen.  It sounds eerily like what Paul told the church in Ephesus when describing the armor of God.  The various components—helmet, breastplate, sword, and other elements—protect a Christian from the attacks of the devil and his minions (see Ephesians 6:11-20). Protection can be a good thing—we just need to be aware of the problem and prepare accordingly.

I Saw the Light – Hank Williams’s Demons and Darkness

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“Everybody has a little darkness in ‘em.”

Hank Williams is one of the names that is synonymous with country music. He has been inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame, the Songwriting Hall of Fame, and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. There are so many songs associated with him that it’s hard to believe that he died when he was only 29. I Saw the Light is a celebration of Williams and his music from writer-director Marc Abraham.

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The film shows us Williams’s (Tom Hiddleston) life from the mid-1940s, when he is playing on a local radio station and in road houses, until his death from a heart attack on New Year’s Day 1953 on the way to a show. Hiddleston, who does his own singing in the film, does a wonderful job of creating a persona that evokes the legend of Hank Williams. The opening song, sung by Hiddleston standing alone in the spotlight, sets the stage for an admiration of this music. The film follows his meteoric career, his tempestuous relationship with his wife Audrey (Elizabeth Olsen), the domineering influence of his mother Lillie (Cherry Jones), and his struggles with alcoholism and pain medication to treat his spina bifida.

While the film has a good deal that will appeal to audiences (especially the performances and the sampling of Williams’s music), the film is a bit superficial. I came away from watching this feeling like I didn’t really get a chance to know him and to appreciate the demons he was dealing with. Those demons are more than just his addictions. We see a glimpse of his ambition, but not really the struggle to achieve his goals—nor the reasons he let it all begin to slip away while he was on top. His relationships with women—Audrey and Lillie especially—were never easy, but we aren’t really sure why.

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We also don’t see anything of the spiritual side of his life. The one line in the film that points to that is when he says “I made a little poem to the Lord. It might turn into a song.” The implication is this is the genesis of the song that lends its name to the title of the film—although we only hear him singing that song quietly to his infant son as a lullaby. (The song does come up again at his death.) Williams was a man who knew about the dark side of life, but who also had a foundation that gave him hope even with all the troubles in his life. His saw his songs not only as the darkness that everybody has within, but also as an expression of the joy that also is available to us. This combination of a flawed life and the understanding that there was something that could overcome those flaws, I think, is a side of Williams’s life that could have been examined a bit. He is, after all, the one who penned:

I wandered so aimless life filed with sin
I wouldn’t let my dear savior in
Then Jesus came like a stranger in the night
Praise the Lord I saw the light.

Photos courtesy of Sony Picture Classics